Perihal aku dan gaji

Semenjak dah meningkat umur aku ni, nafsu apabila melihat barang- barang wanita di pasaran makin meningkat. Memang aku teringin nak pakai barang2 mahal,,hand bag dan kasut carlo rino, guess, polo, elle, blablabla. Nak menyarung jeans mahal dan melaram dengan jam tangan mahal. Tapi dengan status aku yang masih lagi seorang student dan hanya mempunayi pendapatan hanya 1 ribu lebih sebulan sebagai research assistant kepada supervisor aku, manalah aku mampu nak memiliki sume tu. Aku hanya mampu menyara diri..makan minum, minyak kereta, tol dan lain-lain keperluan. Sampai masa nak beli barang penting macam spender dan baju dalam pon kadang tak termampu. Kadang-kadang tengok orang berkerjaya tetap dengan pendapatan RM 4 ribu sebulan, memang aku rasa jeles sangat. Takkan ade istilah pakaian dan barang tiruan dalam wardrobe diorang. Sumenya mesti berjenama dan kalau nak shopping tu tak payah nak pikir panjang dan bajet sana sini. Aku nak macam tu dan aku sangat jeles dengan orang yang mampu miliki ape diorang nak.

Tapi janganlah compare aku yang bergaji RM seribu lebih sebulan dengan orang yang bergaji RM 4k lebih sebulan dengan statement pedih macam ni.."Tak kesah la dia nak beli ape pon, die banyak duit..". Self esteem aku berada ditahap 0. Thank you sangatt..

How to forget your first love

1) Find greater second love

2) Finish all your works

3) Pray.

4) Be open (heart and mind)

5) Be yourself

6) Love yourself

7) Do self correction

8) Smoke (if necessary)

9) Accept dinner invitation by a nerd.

Meja study..hehh

Yelah takde motif .. saje

Talk about karma.

One of my friend told me he has been haunted by KARMA now, after doing bad thing to other people 3 years ago. He left his girlfriend for other woman without telling her anything, didnt give her any sign. At that time he didnt feel guitly at all. He was very happy with the new woman. And now the woman left him for younger man. She just ditch him away, similar way he left his previous girlfriend. He said to me, karma is doing its job, its take only 3 years to punish him for the wrong doing. "What ever you give, you get back". Popular qoute. Everyone know it.

I now single after being double for almost three years. Do I now been punished by my own KARMA? I take 'him' from other woman. I was young and stupid last time, he told me he already break up from his fiance. And right after 3 years (yes, also 3 years) he went away from me. Seems like karma is punishing me. Serve me right. Will pray for that 'kakak' hapiness ever after. I heard shes already married. She called me, to confirm my relationship with her fiance at that time, shes nice and soft talking person. Dont ever take others happiness for yours, maybe the most selfish thing to do. KARMA will for sure punish you well.  

Kerja and Jodoh

Man, man, man, man...banyak gila kerja sekarang. bulan 6 aku ade present final result. memang menangis kali ni dengan keje and tekanan yang bakal dihadapi. Sampai personal life pon dah berterabur. Very shitty perasaannye disaat semua orang sedang manghadapi kebahagian menjalani alam perkahwinan, bina keluarga yakni beranak dan terus beranak. Huh...Entah bila aku nak lalui semua tu. Calon untuk nak kawen pon takde, apetah lagi nak pregnant and ade anak?? Liat jodoh. Mungkin aku akan jd mcm ni..Huhh..Orang sekeliling dah tanya, bila nak kahwin....Mana la aku tahu, jodoh Allah yang tentukan. Huhh..Need to pray very hard kot.